We Are Married

Starting at a new workplace is always scary - especially in a setting that you have never worked at before. I was a house officer in hospital and a medical officer in emergency department, MCH clinic and outpatient clinic. Then, became a medical officer in-charge for 5 years. In conclusion, I have worked with patients and a team of different professions for the past 10 years. Now, my work involves various ranks of professions (specialists, medical officers, nurses), other departments (eg state health dept), planning and data analysis...and no patients directly. When I first started, it was already the last quarter of 2023. So, naturally, all the plans were laid out and all I had to do was follow them. I was lucky that my predecessor was still in the same office as me, so I got to ask him anything. I was familiar with the bulk of things because I was an MCH medical officer at a clinic before. But, I did not realize how extensive the program had gotten for the past 5 years. It was huge. ...

Dearest had a mental breakdown last night because he was scared that I will be angry with him because he was going back to working shift hours. Okay, this needs some background. When both of our kids were less than 5 years old, I was working office hours and he was working ED (emergency department) shift. It was especially hard for me because both kids needed extra care and attention and I needed to get out to work before 7am every morning to beat the morning traffic. So, of course, it was hard for me especially when he was not around in the morning when I had to rush to prepare them for daycare. It was also hard for me because most of my weekend was spent on doing house chores that I could not get done during the weekdays due to tiredness. Naturally, I was tired all the time...and he was tired all the time, too, due to the irregular working hours. This went on for about 2 years, then I moved to a nearer workplace...but with shift hours too 😅 but, the kids were easier to manage as I d...

I was a boss for five years in a small unit which consisted about 20 staff at a time. I started as a novice and was never provided any training whether in administrations, operations or leadership. My predecessor chose me and she passed over to me without any proper written note. Then, I received a letter and started the work. I always think about this today; how I had to learn everything myself. I decided I was not going to do that to my successor. I spent about one month to complete my task list to pass over to the next boss. I started early because I knew that most of the tasks are done monthly and I wanted to make sure I did not miss anything. A smooth transition is, after all, important as it ensures the continuity of a unit's operations.  But, as I completed my list, I realized that there are things that you cannot really pass over. The intangibilities, such as, your way of thinking and problem-solving, the work culture you cultivated within the unit and your leadership, are ...

I was slacking last month due to emotional and personal reasons; I really wanted to get out of my current workplace and I knew that this month will be hell to go through. So, I let myself dwell in the misery of wondering what hell the month would be. The result was I slacked in the workplace for one whole month. The upside? My subordinates were happy because I was not my usual disciplined self. Yeay for them. Then, July came and it did bring with it the hell that I predicted. And some. Thankfully, I read this in Harvard Business Review's Instagram page  which was adapted from “Emotional Agility,” by Susan David and Christina Congleton : Leaders stumble not because they have undesirable thoughts and feelings - that's inevitable - but because they get hooked by them like fish caught in a line .   I realized that I was being emotionally rigid - I did not allow my emotions to change in order to adapt to the situation I faced. I dwelled on my negative thoughts and emotions because...

This morning as I was leaving for work, I overheard my elder daughter asked Dearest, "Don't you have school holidays?". As I closed the house door, I thought, I WISH we have one, too, dear. Being children of parents who do not have a traditional 8 to 5 with weekends off work schedule, my children usually are not bothered about holidays and weekends. But, as the elder one entered primary school, I think she has developed an understanding about a typical week schedule. She must have found it weird when she had to explain to her friends that she spent the weekend at her grandparents' house because her parents were working. Also, how both she and her brother had to stay at daycare until 9pm some nights because both of her parents were working a PM shift.  I do think about the impact that this disorganised daily / weekly schedule has on my children. I recently read Angela Duckworth's Grit  and...it is not entering my favourite books list. This is mainly because her wri...

Adam Grant tweeted: And it hit me: If the bosses were being problematic and the toxic culture somehow spilled into my workplace (which is physically not in the same place as the top management office), it is NOT my job to fix it. My job is to protect and support my team, not hope or try to change the bosses' attitude. If the bosses somehow have other (boring) priorities, I can voice out my opinion and just accept it when they denied my request.  I was only 30 when I took up this manager post. I did not have any prior experience as a manager and I always tried my best to please the bosses. I only took the post because I was looking for challenge. I thought that winning each battle was the top priority. I only changed after I enrolled in MBA, especially after learning about organizational behaviour. As fate has it, in this department there was an MBA program for medical officers interested in management. I started my course and fell head over heels in love with it. I graduated with ...

During a recent read, I learned about the Cynefin Framework: (Source: HBR article here ) I think this is an interesting framework. It helps me to categorize each conflict and how best to first approach it. The framework arranges the steps in order of priority for each category.  There are four areas in which I can classify a problem which I am facing: Simple, Chaos, Complicated, Complex and Disorder. In each area, except for Disorder, the responses are arranged in the order in which one we should do first.  Simple problems are problems which we have faced before and we have already formed a strategy to solve previously, which are our "Best Practice". In facing a Simple problem, we first have to sense it, which means recognizing it as a problem that we have a strategy for. We then categorize the problem to respond to it with our Best Practice. For example, in an outpatient clinic, a patient comes with fever and the doctor senses and categorizes the fever and responds with a tr...